What Are You Thinking?

"When we choose the right input, we have taken the most important step we can take in determining the right outcome." -Zig Ziglar

 Experts say that the human mind thinks between 50,000-80,000 thoughts per day. That's an average of around 2,100-3,300 thoughts per hour. That's an incredible number.  It's up to you to make sure that you don't use up a majority of them with negative cynical thinking.

 

If you stopped to pay attention to some of your thoughts, you would probably be amazed to discover that many of them, at the time, are useless, unimportant, random thoughts and recollections from past conversations or experiences, or something that you have heard or learned.  Self-talk is the endless stream of unspoken thoughts that run through your head. These automatic thoughts can be positive or negative. Some of your self-talk comes from logic and reason. Other self-talk may arise from misconceptions that you create because of lack of information.

 

Time spent alone in thought can be a positive, rich environment for personal growth and creativity. Yet, getting “in our own heads” can also be dangerous when we are negatively turned against ourselves. There is an important difference between introspection and rumination. Introspection can be a process of healthy self-reflection examination, and exploration, all of which is good for our well-being and our brain. Doctors describe positive time reflecting on yourself as a good thing in which people check in with themselves to see where they’re at emotionally. This process of self-reflection is important to staying tuned in to our own mind. It helps us to know ourselves, to understand our emotions and to choose how we behave.

 

Rumination, on the other hand, can lead us to spiral into a vicious cycle of negative thinking that holds us back and hurts us in our lives. The problem is that our mind is not always a safe place. Every person is divided between a healthy attitude toward themselves that is goal-directed and life-affirming and a destructive side of themselves that can be self-critical, self-denying, paranoid and suspicious. This critical inner voice can take over our thinking and lead to rumination. Rumination occurs when we become trapped in that negative cycle of circular thinking. This type of thinking has a strong link to depression. We can invest a lot of time and energy into ruminating on saddening events and things you could have done, or done differently. Unfortunately, if you keep on dwelling on the past, you cannot come up with a strategy that will make you proud today. Recognize when you start replaying negative thoughts, tell yourself to “stop!”

 

Some common forms of negative self-talk include:

 

• Filtering. You magnify the negative aspects of a situation and filter out all of the positive ones. For example, you had a great day at work. You completed your tasks ahead of time and were complimented for doing a speedy and thorough job. That evening, you focus only on your plan to do even more tasks and forget about the compliments you received.
• Personalizing. When something bad occurs, you automatically blame yourself. For example, you hear that an evening out with friends is canceled, and you assume that the change in plans is because no one wanted to be around you.
• Catastrophizing. You automatically anticipate the worst. The drive-through coffee shop gets your order wrong and you automatically think that the rest of your day will be a disaster.
• Polarizing. You see things only as either good or bad. There is no middle ground. You feel that you have to be perfect or you're a total failure.

 

You must learn to focus on the positive. When you actively focus on the positive you can learn to turn the negative thinking into positive thinking. The process is simple, but it does take time and practice — you're creating a new habit, after all. Here are some ways to think and behave in a more positive and optimistic way:

 

• Identify areas to change. If you want to become more optimistic and engage in more positive thinking, first identify areas of your life that you usually think negatively about, whether it's work, your daily commute or a relationship. You can start small by focusing on one area to approach in a more positive way.
• Check yourself. Periodically during the day, stop and evaluate what you're thinking. If you find that your thoughts are mainly negative, try to find a way to put a positive spin on them.
• Be open to humor. Give yourself permission to smile or laugh, especially during difficult times. Seek humor in everyday happenings. When you can laugh at life, you feel less stressed.
• Follow a healthy lifestyle. Aim to exercise for about 30 minutes on most days of the week. You can also break it up into 10-minute chunks of time during the day. Exercise can positively affect mood and reduce stress. Follow a healthy diet to fuel your mind and body. And learn techniques to manage stress.
• Surround yourself with positive people. Make sure those in your life are positive, supportive people you can depend on to give helpful advice and feedback. Negative people may increase your stress level and make you doubt your ability to manage stress in healthy ways.
• Actively practice positive self-talk. Start by following one simple rule: Don't say anything to yourself that you wouldn't say to anyone else. Be gentle and encouraging with yourself. If a negative thought enters your mind, evaluate it rationally and respond with affirmations of what is good about you. Think about things you're thankful for in your life.

 

Mindfulness meditation is another healthy practice we can adopt that has been proven, not only to improve the quality of our lives, but to possibly extend the length of our lives. When we learn to meditate, we learn to choose our thoughts. We are better able to consciously steer away from the directives of our critical inner voice. When we learn mindfulness, we gain the power of familiarizing ourselves with our thoughts and our patterns. We can get to know our critical inner voices, and we can start to recognize when these cruel thoughts start to surface. We can then choose to steer our minds away from these thoughts.

 

When we do take time to be mindful and introspective, we must adopt an attitude of being curious, open, accepting, and loving. We can then think about what we want to challenge in ourselves and how we want to differentiate from negative past influences.  In this way, we give our lives meaning and direction without falling victim to the inner critic that holds us back and keeps us from achieving our goals.

 

When we are in the realistic point of view of our “real self,” we can have positive self-reflection. When we are in the point of view of our anti-self, experiencing thoughts that focus on us as “bad,” we should make a conscious effort to avoid ruminating. There are seven other activities on the Healthy Mind Platter that are far more favorable when in this state, including play time, physical time, and connecting time.

 

We get consumed with what we think about most.  In tough or stressful times, those thoughts can become overwhelming to us if we let it. And if we let it continue to fester it will affect your attitude and mindset, compounding the negative feelings.  Just remember you have the power to control and choose how you let things affect you; choose your thoughts, choose your responses.  You are in control.  You have full control over two domains: your interpretations and your responses.

 

If the thoughts that run through your head are mostly negative, your outlook on life is more likely pessimistic. If your thoughts are mostly positive, you're likely an optimist — someone who practices positive thinking. Instead you must focus on positive thinking. Focus on gratitude and thankfulness. Positive thinking doesn't mean that you keep your head in the sand and ignore life's less pleasant situations. Positive thinking just means that you approach unpleasantness in a more positive and productive way. You think the best is going to happen, not the worst.

 

Researchers continue to explore the effects of positive thinking and optimism on health. Health benefits that positive thinking may provide include:

 

• Increased life span
• Lower rates of depression
• Lower levels of distress
• Greater resistance to the common cold
• Better psychological and physical well-being
• Better cardiovascular health and reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease
• Better coping skills during hardships and times of stress

 

It's unclear why people who engage in positive thinking experience these health benefits. One theory is that having a positive outlook enables you to cope better with stressful situations, which reduces the harmful health effects of stress on your body. It's also thought that positive and optimistic people tend to live healthier lifestyles — they get more physical activity, follow a healthier diet, and don't smoke or drink alcohol in excess.

 

Our lives become a reflection of the thoughts we think, the attitudes we choose and the actions we take. Change the way you think and you will change your life.  What are the stories you have told yourself as to why you haven’t achieved the life you desire? Write the script of your own life, rehearse it in your mind, then go out and perform it to the best of your ability. If you realized how powerful your thoughts are, you would never think a negative thought. When we choose the right input, we choose a better future. Make the right choices. Start today.

 

Make today great!

 

Curtis

 

"You may believe that you are responsible for what you do, but not for what you think. The truth is that you are responsible for what you think, because it is only at this level that you can exercise choice. What you do comes from what you think." - Quote from A Course in Miracles